A Few Reasons Why Magicians Prefer Cards over Women...
You can trade a well-worn deck for a new one and never hear a complaint.
You can keep one pack at home and have another for when you're on the road.
If you admire a friend's pack and tell him so, he will probably let you play around with it for a while.
Your deck will stay with you, even after you have no more 'outs'.
When you throwaway an old deck, it won't go around and tell other decks that you have small hands.
A pack of cards doesn't require much closet space.
You can get cards to cooperate no matter what day of the month it is.
A pack of cards doesn't mind if you fall asleep in the middle of handling it.
There's no jail time if you perform a Card Stab.
Any time you wish, you can spread cards across a tabletop and turn them over.
Licking a woman won't make her stick to your forehead.
A color change will run you the better part of a hundred bucks at a hair salon.
You won't rupture yourself picking up a jumbo card.
If the trick only takes two minutes, nobody complains.
A well-stacked deck is fairly low-maintenance.
If you want to try something a little different, the deck won't call your mother and tell her you are a depraved sicko.
It doesn't bother you when your audience tells you that their last magician had a jumbo deck.
No such thing as "Pre-Ink Syndrome"
Copyright 1990, 1995 by Steven L. Beam